How confident are you? It makes a difference, you know. The measure of your self-confidence is revealed in a variety of ways: your voice, the language you use, your body language, your grooming and much more.
Self-confident people have a natural magnetism about them. They can be identified almost immediately when they enter a room. They walk with buoyancy, stand with dignity, speak with conviction, and love with passion. They know where they have been, where they’re going, and why. They believe they are able to solve problems, overcome obstacles, and achieve goals.
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Self-confident people inspire trust and gain the support and loyalty of their family, friends, bosses, clients and even strangers.
You want to be that kind of person; so do I.
But what is confidence? Is it swagger, hubris, or arrogance? Is the ability to prance around a room like a show horse on steroids? Certainly not. Just the opposite.
The simplest definition of confidence is “full trust”. True confidence is full-trust in oneself and one’s strength, abilities, intelligence, and good judgment. One writer calls confidence “undisturbed calm”.
The word “confidence” comes from two Latin words, conducere from which we get the word “conduct” and fidere which means “to trust”, the same word from which we get the words fidelity and faithfulness. So to have confidence means to “conduct or behave in a trustworthy or faithful manor”.
There are two extremes of confidence. One extreme is mistrust and self-doubt where you have no confidence in your ability to do anything; the other extreme is arrogant self-conceit where you think you are much better than you really are.
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True confidence stands squarely between the two extremes. A confident person has a realistic view of his skills based on knowledge and experience. He is neither arrogant nor self-effacing. He does not have to be belligerent to get his way nor must he be so timid that he is little more than a doormat.
Balanced self-confidence is what you want and you can have it. Self-confidence can be learned. No matter how uncertain or insecure you feel right now you can build the kind of confidence you desire.
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©2014 Ronald D. Ross
To read all of Dr. Ross’ columns visit RonRossToday.com. Subscribe to his weekly newsletter and receive your free copy of Acquire Confidence, a compilation of Acquire Confidence columns.
- The Two Most Important Questions to Ask Yourself
- Four Cheap and Futile Ways to Acquire Confidence